Life it is a changin

Life seems to change so quickly for me of late. The kids and I are doing really pretty well in the aftermath of Rick's death. I know it's easier for me than the kids. I didn't lose my dad. And because of that it's a little hard for me to understand how to best help them. I just do what I can for now and keep going. I am still dealing with the MOUNTAIN of paperwork that is left behind. Blech. Still having to process all that. It's hard because I can't really do anything since I am not his next of kin. His mom has to handle it and she works full time so time isn't a luxury she has much of. It's a terrible double edged thing.

Anyway, the good things in life at the moment are: J got in to the Academy here in town. That is huge! It's a charter school of sorts that does things a little different-more tailoring the education to what fits the student. Brain based education etc. H is on the waiting list for her grade in the fall but I am praying that she will get in. Financially things are looking better. Social security will kick in to help out with the lost income from child support so I am going to be ok in that aspect. At least able to breathe and not be consumed with worry about money. I have a new nephew, born in the midst of all the chaos this month. My brother and his wife have added a son to their family and I couldn't be happier! He looks much like the baby pictures of my brother and J is really excited that he has a boy cousin. He doesn't understand that Jack won't be playing with him yet but that's ok. All in good time. And last but not least, I got a Mac! (At an amazing price!!!) Been stashing money away for a bit and I was able to pick it up yesterday. It's used but oh so wonderful! So at the moment I am in bed blogging. Yeah for wireless!!!! Love love love having a laptop not to mention that it is a Mac! Have to get a bag for it now, so that I can take it with me so that will be my next fun thing.

Do keep praying for me on this though. I am really trying to balance my emotional response to girlfriend. I know that she lost someone she cared for deeply, but it is really hard not to hold her responsible in ways. She helped Rick's decent into this pit and forgiving that is hard. That and she seems to want to be in contact with me. Not so much of late, as she is moved out to her own place and getting on with her life, but there for a while it felt like she was attempting to maintain a relationship with the kids etc. Not gonna happen. Maybe I'm reading it wrong. I don't know. I do know that I need to see her the way Christ would and not through my filter of humanity and pain. Of course that doesn't mean putting my kids in the mix. That I know.

Anyway, pinging thoughts for lazy Saturday morning. It's all good baby. It's all good.